Last night, I went to my weekly religion class that I attend. It’s always an uplifting experience for me and I look forward to it every week. During the lesson, the teacher said something that struck a chord with me and that I wanted to share with you today.
He said “Forget about what didn’t happen and look to the future.”
I think so often we get upset about things that have happened in our lives but I think the things that didn’t happen haunt us more. This applies to so many aspects of life.
I didn’t get into that school I’ve been dreaming of for years.
I didn’t get the grade I wanted to get.
I didn’t eat well the last couple of days.
It didn’t end up working out with that person I was dating.
I didn’t get that job I was perfect for.
I didn’t get that promotion I deserved.
I didn’t workout yesterday and now I feel behind.
I didn’t PR in that race after all that hard work.
Every day I talk to participants in our wellness programs who are working toward different goals. When I ask them about how their goals have been coming along since we last spoke with them, a common answer is something like “Well this goal went ok, but I didn’t do well at that other goal”. I feel like that is a nice little summary of how life is in general. Some days we do really well and like what we’re doing and other days we know we could have done better.
So should we do? “Forget what didn’t happen”. Regret, doubt, and hanging on to something that is now passed are not the healthiest ways to deal with disappointment. Learning to let go (something I am still working on) is sooo important to maintain peace and happiness in our lives! When we hold on to something, even the wish that something had happened, it only hurts us and keeps us from doing the next step in the process.
“Look to the future”. Where there have been opportunities missed or decisions made that didn’t end up turning out the way we wanted them to, there’s always the opportunity for growth and progression. Without these experiences, we wouldn’t be as strong, determined, educated and amazing as we are today. So something you wanted to happen didn’t happen. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?! Are you going to sulk around butt hurt or are you going to use this opportunity to rise from the ashes, better than ever and try again? Please oh please, choose the latter.
Just because you missed your workout, doesn’t mean you will be ill prepared for your upcoming event. Just because you didn’t get that job, doesn’t mean you’ll never find a job you love. Just because you didn’t get that scholarship, doesn’t mean you can’t find another way to attend your dream school.
The future is pure. It hasn’t happened yet. It has so much potential and possibility. Don’t taint it already by giving up and taking those opportunities away from yourself.
This is something that from what I can tell (and I could be wrong) most of us could work on, or at least need reminding from time to time. Disappointments and poor choices are part of life. But we can’t let them dictate our lives. We need the motivation to get back on the horse, try harder, do the necessary work, and look to a brighter future where we are successful in our endeavors. Because if you keep it up, I know you can do hard things.
What are some ways you let go of disappointments?
What do you to do look to the future?